every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
