Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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