How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
