Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
