Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
