New invention idea: vibrating tampons
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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