We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
