whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Soap is not a condiment
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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