The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
