I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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