I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
