he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize