Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
