i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
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