hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
