If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Randomize
