I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
we made out on top of his cat.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
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