i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
