I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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