So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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