Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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