So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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