I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
