he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
operation have a gay friend backfired
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
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