I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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