Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
