just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
