If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
