I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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