I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
