His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
