My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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