We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
