Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
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