my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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