WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
