we're blogging at a bar
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
