she looked like the bat from fern gully.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
