Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
