So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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