I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
