i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
