No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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