I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
