If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
