I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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