This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize