i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
