WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Your cock deserves a montage
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
