So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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